With that tongue-in-cheek battle cry, the nerdsome foursome declared their war against mediocrity. Fueled by the omni-ambitious doctrine of ALL (not ALL the band… that comes later the concept, based on the TOTAL EXTENT, the peak of pinnacles) and a series of caffeine binges, the essences of punk and pop were percolated together in a way that has yet to be recreated, though many have died trying. Ranks of sympathetic adolescents, previously excluded from the ferocious world of punk rock, followed the sound. They boldly strapped on their glasses, wiped their noses on their sleeves, and launched into the slam pit chanting the DESCENDENTS’ refrain “I’m not a loser” like a mantra.

In 1978 the DESCENDENTS formed under their common credo of fishing, girls and velocity. Existing briefly as a power trio, the LA-based group released the 7″ single Ride The Wild before recruiting a certain crop-haired honors class geek cum heartthrob (enter Milo Aukerman, he of the ubiquitous album illustrations) on vocals. They released the Fat EP in 1981, the only record in the DESCENDENTS’ expansive catalog that does not contain a single love song. The quintessential DESCENDENTS album, Milo Goes To College, hit local record stores in 1982. Its fusion of catchy melodies with raw, spastic energy (henceforward known as “power pop”, “melodic hardcore”, or the ever popular “pop punk”) caused the Los Angeles Times to write, “perfect for the little guy who was ever called a nerd and never got the girl. The Chain Saw pop combined with earthy humor conveys what is often an inarticulate rage.”